Although holidays can sometimes feel loaded down with expectation and busyness, especially within the family dynamic, there is always opportunity to lighten our experience or the feeling tone of a situation.
Try to cultivate more joy and delight!
Children encourage and embody these naturally. Grandparents can attest to this. I never tire from hearing grandparents describe the sheer joy they experience with their grandkids, particularly if changing diapers and discipline are left to the parents.
It’s probably also true that children ask their parents or primary caregivers to enjoy and delight more often than we feel able while we’re busy adulting. I notice this in myself a lot with my kids.
Yet there’s so much literal benefit to it. We can all feel the effects of “happy” hormones released in moments of joy, comfort, or pleasure as they lift our mood, soothe our stress, and improve our metabolism.
Imagine the ripple effect within and without when you laugh heartily, or that warm feeling inside when someone genuinely thanks you for your service or a gift.
But if you’re rolling your eyes and thinking you haven’t got all day to play because you need to bake a pie, pack for travel, clean the house, drive for hours, go shopping for cranberries, potatoes, and lots and lots of butter (gasp!), then maybe take a quick pause for a slow and steady inhale 2-3-4 and exhale 2-3-4…
It only takes micro-moments to brighten your day or appreciate another person. I try to remember this when my kids’ requests for delight feel ill-timed and I’m not sure I can oblige.
You might try some of the following ideas to shift your mood or bring more joyful distraction into your family this week. The jokes have been a recent success in my home on these grey and cold days. And there’s still time to register for Kids & Caregivers Yoga this weekend in Vergennes, VT!
I would also be remiss if I didn’t shout out thanks to my dad for modeling delight and goofiness through the years and inspiring 1-2 of the following ideas. 🙂
Tips to cultivate more joy in your family:
– Genuinely smile at a loved one.
– Recount a funny memory to your family member(s).
– Watch the Laughing Guy on the subway train.
– Express delight in your child’s efforts and honor their accomplishment, “You put a lot of effort into that,” or “Your [insert object] is very creative!”
– When your child (or adult relative?!) complains for the umpteenth time, run away exclaiming something provocative and random like, “You can’t catch me, I’m the gingerbread man!” or “Help! I have to pee!”
– Make eye contact with an adult family member when they tell you about their accomplishment or work in progress.
– Wear your shoes on the wrong feet when you go out with family and act unawares.
– Pretend to pick your nose in the kitchen while cooking: deeply bend your pointer finger, place the middle knuckle at your nostril, rotate your hand like you’re digging, and make intensely focused faces or sounds. [Thanks, Dad!]
– Start a spontaneous family dance party.